Making Space for What’s to Come

When was the last time you’ve let something special go?

I did, a few days ago. And it wasn’t just something, it was most of my things.

I finally had my place in Manila packed up, and rather than ship my things to Aklan, I chose to give them away to my cousins. I knew I didn’t need my things as much as I did then, so this decision came easy to me. (The hassle of packing, shipping, and the costs didn’t seem worth it to me either.)

The moment I saw my things in boxes though, I felt an overwhelming sadness. It was easier to let go without seeing what I was letting go of. So that day, I stuffed myself with Korean food and Soju.

I could have stuffed myself with more Korean food the next day, but I chose to sit with the sadness. I reminisced about the many, many books that I’ve collected over the years. How excited I was as I filled an entire wall with books that I refused to declutter years ago because to my defense, every single one sparked joy!

Then last night, a friend of mine asked why I decided to let go of all my books because she knew how much I loved my books. She asked why I didn’t save at least of couple for myself. And that’s when it hit me. I didn’t feel any attachment to those books anymore because the wisdom and magic of those books are already in me. They have served their purpose. And the ones I never got around to reading…I’m probably never going to in the future.

That’s when I started feeling more at peace. That’s also when I started to understand what I was feeling. I wasn’t sad because I was losing things. In fact, a part of me feels grateful knowing that the things that I used to love will experience new life through my cousins and the people who will be reading my books. I know that they will be valued more that way, than if they stayed with me.

I realized that what I was feeling was the empty spaces because I’ve let go of so much. And I know that when we let go of things, the universe finds ways to fill up those spaces again.

That’s something beautiful to look forward to. :)

PS: In case you’re wondering, we’ll be selling my books to a bookstore.

PPS: Since I was on a roll with the letting go thing, I cleaned up all my emails (all 8 of them!) and unsubscribed to pretty much all email subscriptions! Oh, the joy of seeing ZERO UNREAD MAIL!